The Catholic Coaching Podcast
When we encountered New Age philosophies in Life Coaching that ran counter to our Christian beliefs, we decided to take the best practices of Life Coaching and infuse them with the rich traditions of our Catholic Faith. We're Matt and Erin Ingold, Catholic coaches and the founders of Metanoia Catholic, our Catholic Life Coaching Company. Join us as we share practical coaching tips to being transformed by the renewing of your mind so that you can be free to discover and choose your greatest calling in life.
The Catholic Coaching Podcast
Phlegmatics & Conflict: How to Stop Sacrificing Peace for Quick Relief
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Welcome back to The Catholic Coaching Podcast with Matt and Erin! In Episode 305, we are continuing our sub-series on how different temperaments navigate healthy, holy conflict resolution. Today, we are putting the "Peaceful Phlegmatic" in the hot seat.
Have you ever walked away from a difficult conversation feeling relieved that it's over, only to realize later that you never actually said what you needed to say?
Phlegmatics possess an incredible superpower: they are naturally calm under pressure, patient, and excellent mediators. However, their deep aversion to rocking the boat can lead them to use "assuming goodwill" or quick compliance as an escape hatch to avoid the discomfort of real, arduous conversations.
In this episode, Matt and Erin walk through the 4-part PACE framework (Pause, Assume Goodwill, Clarify, Engage) specifically tailored for Phlegmatics:
• The difference between true, lasting peace and temporary emotional relief.
• How Phlegmatics inadvertently confuse "processing" an emotion with completely suppressing or ignoring it.
• Practical scripts and strategies for bringing your honest thoughts to the table during the Clarify phase.
• Why a passive-aggressive "yes" hurts relationships, and how to practice the virtue of fortitude to build stable, reliable harmony.
As St. Thomas Aquinas famously said, "The things that we love tell us what we are." Phlegmatics, do you love true relational peace, or are you settling for mere relief?
If you enjoyed this episode, please drop a like, subscribe, and share it with a friend who needs to hear it!
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